{"id":214,"date":"2014-10-06T20:19:59","date_gmt":"2014-10-06T20:19:59","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/thechewtoys.com\/?page_id=214"},"modified":"2014-10-07T05:54:28","modified_gmt":"2014-10-07T05:54:28","slug":"lyrics","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"http:\/\/thechewtoys.com\/?page_id=214","title":{"rendered":"LYRICS"},"content":{"rendered":"

CRYING ON THE INSIDE<\/strong><\/p>\n

I got a feather boa \/\u00a0And a robot car \/\u00a0I\u2019m a future A-bear \/\u00a0And a former porn star \/\u00a0I\u2019m a White Party King \/\u00a0I’m a hung daddy top \/\u00a0I\u2019m the boy next door \/\u00a0I\u2019m an undercover cop<\/p>\n

Give em what they pay for \/\u00a0No one gets the real you \/That guy who\u2019s got it all \/\u00a0He\u2019s more fucked up than you<\/p>\n

I\u2019m always on the list \/\u00a0I\u2019m friends with Madonna \/\u00a0I was Mr Valley Pride \/\u00a0I\u2019ll do anything you wanna<\/p>\n

I\u2019m better than you\u2026.\/\u00a0But I\u2019m crying<\/p>\n

I was a fat kid \/\u00a0I was pushed around \/\u00a0I was never enough \/\u00a0That\u2019s why I\u2019m putting you down \/\u00a0I wanna die \/\u00a0I was a nice guy \/\u00a0I wanna die\/\u00a0If I can\u2019t be that guy<\/p>\n

SHUTDOWN<\/strong><\/p>\n

I\u2019m gonna shut down \/\u00a0Pull the blinds down \/\u00a0And hide away for me \/\u00a0Find me a rabbit hole \/\u00a0A bunker built to save my soul \/\u00a0And what\u2019s important to me<\/p>\n

Just my dogs, just my dogs and me<\/p>\n

I\u2019m very bored of my own inner dialog \/\u00a0I\u2019d rather be simple, happy like my dogs \/\u00a0Get your dull chatter out of my gray matter \/\u00a0Please<\/p>\n

I\u2019m gonna shy away \/\u00a0From petty things that people say \/\u00a0To save a bit of me \/\u00a0Find my inner circle crew \/\u00a0And take em where \u2018m going to \/\u00a0For an evolved party<\/p>\n

Friends and booze, friends and booze, and me.<\/p>\n

I\u2019m stoned in the sun listening to FUZZ \/\u00a0Deaf to all you say \/\u00a0On a canyon run with my Dozer son \/\u00a0And everything\u2019s ok<\/p>\n

\u00a0OLD FROSTY MUG<\/strong><\/p>\n

I began my drinkin \/\u00a0When I was just a pup \/\u00a0Got my first paycheck \/\u00a0Bought a drinkin cup \/\u00a0Booze motivates me \/\u00a0Any gig I can grab \/Save up my earnings \/\u00a0To pay my bar tab<\/p>\n

Old frosty mug \/\u00a0You keep me drunk \/\u00a0I get a job, I fill you up \/\u00a0Old Frosty Mug \/\u00a0You\u2019re mighty fine \/\u00a0I\u2019ll keep you full\u00a0\/\u00a0On my own dime<\/p>\n

When times are rough\u00a0\/\u00a0Screw the rent\u00a0\/\u00a0That hot bartender\u00a0\/\u00a0Gets my last cent<\/p>\n

In years gone by\u00a0\/\u00a0You\u2019ve been my only friend\u00a0\/\u00a0My liver and I love you\u00a0\/\u00a0It\u2019s Valentines day again\u00a0\/ My\u00a0mug and I are drinkin\u2019 champs\u00a0\/\u00a0We found a bar that takes food stamps\u00a0\/\u00a0E! B! T!<\/p>\n

\u00a0I MISS QUAALUDES<\/strong><\/p>\n

I got my Lady Q\u00a0\/\u00a0From Miss Annie Lee\u00a0\/\u00a0I\u2019m gonna wash her down\u00a0\/\u00a0With a Long Island Tea\u00a0\/\u00a0Feelin\u2019 warm and fuzzy\u00a0\/\u00a0Dancing horny in my head\u00a0\/\u00a0Bumpin thru the crowd\u00a0\/\u00a0Like a teenage Joan Jett<\/p>\n

I miss Quaaludes\u00a0\/\u00a0That fucked up fuzzy funtime\u00a0\/\u00a0Is the best I ever knew\u00a0\/\u00a0I miss Quaaludes<\/p>\n

I made out with 20 people\u00a0\/\u00a0Danced with a hundred more\u00a0\/\u00a0Played chicken out on main street\u00a0\/\u00a0I\u2019m a filthy Quaalude whore\u00a0\/\u00a0I keep hearing rumors\u00a0\/\u00a0Coming down the track\u00a0\/\u00a0Switzerland! Singapore!\u00a0\/\u00a0Bring my sweet lover back<\/p>\n

Quaaludes! Yeah Dude! Quaaludes<\/p>\n

FAT HEATHERS<\/strong><\/p>\n

P-town freeze and drown\u00a0\/\u00a0Founding fathers coming down\u00a0\/\u00a0Hell no, I won\u2019t go\u00a0\/\u00a0To that place\u00a0\/\u00a0Hell no I won\u2019t go\u00a0\/\u00a0It\u2019s a bad place\u00a0\/\u00a0Cranky bears five feet around\u00a0\/\u00a0Fuck off skinny you\u2019re going down \/\u00a0Fat Heathers should know better<\/p>\n

\u00a0I HATE XMAS<\/strong><\/p>\n

I know it\u2019s based\u00a0\/\u00a0On some dumb story\u00a0\/\u00a0Supposed to be allegory\u00a0\/\u00a0The liar, the bastard and the fool\u00a0\/\u00a0All I know is Xmas ain\u2019t cool<\/p>\n

I hate Xmas\u00a0\/\u00a0Deck my balls\u00a0\/\u00a0I hate Xmas\u00a0\/\u00a0Fuck you all<\/p>\n

Who\u2019s the fat guy in the red sweater?\u00a0\/\u00a0For creepy pedos, Dahmer was better\u00a0\/\u00a0Flying reindeer and busy elves?\u00a0\/\u00a0Xmas lovers, go fuck yourselves<\/p>\n

Wrapping gifts that are yours not mine\u00a0\/\u00a0Lonely folks at closing time\u00a0\/\u00a0Hauling a huge tree right inside\u00a0\/\u00a0Is this when that dude was born or died?<\/p>\n

Thank fuck it\u2019s only once a year\u00a0\/\u00a0Hey Santa, bring me a fuckin\u2019 beer<\/p>\n

Don\u2019t give me gifts, I don\u2019t want em\u00a0\/\u00a0Eggnog and pudding are fucking rotten\u00a0\/\u00a0If I see you in a holiday coat\u00a0\/\u00a0I\u2019m gonna kick you in the fucking throat<\/p>\n

\u00a0WE ARE CHEW TOYS<\/strong><\/p>\n

Punk rock music is the best\u00a0\/\u00a0Beat your fists against my chest\u00a0\/\u00a0Garage metal and punk rock\u00a0\/\u00a0Work best on my cock\u00a0\/\u00a0We need to feel the hardcore when it\u2019s real\u00a0\/\u00a0Get your dirty self up to speed\u00a0\/\u00a0Chew Toy attack\u2019s gonna make you bleed\u00a0\/\u00a0Corner us and we\u2019ll come out fighting\u00a0\/\u00a0Feed us, you\u2019ll enjoy the biting\u00a0\/\u00a0Sharpen your teeth, girls and boys\u00a0\/ We are Chew Toys<\/p>\n

Ursa major and Ursa minor\u00a0\/\u00a0No dance beat, no synthesizer\u00a0\/\u00a0Sledgehammer beat on the double\u00a0\/\u00a0Chew Toys are your punk rock thruple<\/p>\n

\u00a0LEATHER SWEATER<\/strong><\/p>\n

I\u2019m all over your shit\u00a0\/\u00a0I got you wrapped up nice and tight\u00a0\/\u00a0I\u2019m all over your shit\u00a0\/\u00a0I\u2019m going heavy when you want it light<\/p>\n

I\u2019m your leather sweater\u00a0\/\u00a0I\u2019m ink and fur and salt and sweat uh huh<\/p>\n

I\u2019m all over your shit\u00a0\/\u00a0I am the one that you think of first\u00a0\/\u00a0I\u2019m all over your shit\u00a0\/\u00a0I\u2019m gonna edge you til you fuckin\u2019 burst<\/p>\n

I\u2019m all over your shit\u00a0\/\u00a0Like the rainstorm that covers this town\u00a0\/\u00a0I\u2019m all over your shit\u00a0\/\u00a0I\u2019m the king that will wear your crown<\/p>\n

\u00a0NO SOY TU PAPI<\/strong><\/p>\n

Te gustan los hombres maduros\u00a0\/\u00a0Aiy, que fascinante\u00a0\/\u00a0Tengo noticias para ti, mijo\u00a0\/\u00a0Nosotros dos, no saldremos juntos<\/p>\n

Oye mijo\u00a0\/\u00a0No soy tu papi\u00a0\/\u00a0Aiy cabron\u00a0\/\u00a0No soy tu pinche pops<\/p>\n

Aiy mijo\u00a0\/\u00a0Vete de aqui\u00a0\/\u00a0Tu tratas mucho!\u00a0\/\u00a0Miley Cyrus no es una artista\u00a0\/\u00a0Dubstep no es avant garde<\/p>\n

Aiy papi me compras una cerveza\u00a0\/\u00a0NO GUEY\u00a0\/\u00a0Aiy papi abrasa me\u00a0\/\u00a0NO GUEY\u00a0\/\u00a0Aiy papi ven aqui\u00a0\/\u00a0NO GUEY\u00a0\/\u00a0Aiy papi eres un pinche joto!\u00a0\/\u00a0\u00a1CHINGATE!<\/p>\n

Eres muy attractivo\u00a0\/\u00a0Pero conosco tus enga\u00f1os\u00a0\/\u00a0Yo tambien fue veinte dos\u00a0\/\u00a0En el ochente seis!<\/p>\n

LARRY (OF THE RODEO)<\/strong><\/p>\n

Well he\u2019s a barndancin\u2019 bastard\u00a0\/\u00a0Reviled and revered\u00a0\/\u00a0He\u2019ll give you a workin\u2019 over\u00a0\/\u00a0If you\u2019re 45 with a beard\u00a0\/\u00a0He rounds up all the cowboys\u00a0\/\u00a0Sooner than they reckoned\u00a0\/\u00a0\u00a0He rides em on the first date\u00a0\u00a0\/\u00a0And buries em on the second<\/p>\n

And he\u2019s slow slow quick quick slow\u00a0\/\u00a0He\u2019s Larry Larry Larry of the rodeo<\/p>\n

Hey boy keep your eye out\u00a0\/\u00a0He\u2019s more snake than rattle\u00a0\/\u00a0Hell, before you know it\u00a0\/\u00a0That\u2019s him in your saddle\u00a0\/\u00a0He likes it down and dirty\u00a0\/\u00a0Ain\u2019t got no need for words\u00a0\/\u00a0And if you get to ride him\u00a0\/\u00a0You\u2019re gonna need spurs<\/p>\n

Arizona gives him a boner\u00a0\/\u00a0But Texas is where the sex is\u00a0\/\u00a0Get on his dance card\u00a0\/\u00a0Because he\u2019s ever, ever hard<\/p>\n

Now you\u2019ve heard the story\u00a0\/\u00a0Of our dancin\u2019 man\u00a0\/\u00a0Grab a hold of Larry\u00a0\/\u00a0And two step while you can\u00a0\/\u00a0Like all good cowboys\u00a0\/\u00a0Larry\u2019s got two morals\u00a0\/\u00a0Be\u00a0versatile at butt sex\u00a0\/ Be\u00a0famous for your\u00a0oral<\/p>\n

BEANTOWN BOYS<\/strong><\/p>\n

Greggy was a sick pup\u00a0\/\u00a0With a heart of gold\u00a0\/\u00a0Twisted for a youngster\u00a0\/\u00a0Impossible to hold\u00a0\/\u00a0Drinkin\u2019 til the brownout\u00a0\/\u00a0Playin\u2019 guitar and drums\u00a0\/\u00a0You think he\u2019s pretty now?\u00a0\/\u00a0You should see him when he\u2026<\/p>\n

Honeydew! You wanna?\u00a0\/\u00a0Take me to the Fenns!\u00a0\/\u00a0Honey, do you wanna\u00a0\/\u00a0Meet some Red Sox Men?\u00a0\/\u00a0Honey do you wanna\u00a0\/\u00a0Hang out at Roy\u2019s\u00a0\/\u00a0Can\u2019t get enough of those\u00a0\/\u00a0Beantown boys<\/p>\n

Kevin was a copper\u00a0\/\u00a0We met in the Pines\u00a0\/\u00a0Took him to a rooftop\u00a0\/\u00a0Worked off some fines\u00a0\/\u00a0He lived in Methuen\u00a0\/\u00a0He lived with his mom\u00a0\/\u00a0He was into edging\u00a0\/ \u00a0Under the gun<\/p>\n

Graham wasn\u2019t born there\u00a0\/\u00a0And they made him leave\u00a0\/\u00a0Voice so sexy\u00a0\/\u00a0I forgot to breathe\u00a0\/\u00a0You should hear it\u00a0\/\u00a0Velvety soft\u00a0\/\u00a0He used it to get me\u00a0\/\u00a0And then it got me off<\/p>\n

I\u2019m coming down 84\u00a0\/\u00a0I\u2019m coming like I did before\u00a0\/\u00a0You and me together soon\u00a0\/\u00a0Grab a table at Kowloon<\/p>\n

Mikey\u2019s not a lover\u00a0\/\u00a0But no one\u2019s just a friend\u00a0\/\u00a0Fuzziest bastard\u00a0\/\u00a0In the North End\u00a0\/\u00a0Thunderbird eyebrows\u00a0\/\u00a0Swan boat smile\u00a0\/\u00a0He moved to LA now\u00a0\/\u00a0Says it\u2019s better by a mile<\/p>\n

\u00a0TIMMY NUTBAG<\/strong><\/p>\n

Iphone bright zipper\u00a0\/\u00a0Chinese big dipper\u00a0\/\u00a0Being a seditionist\u00a0\/\u00a0Running from the communists\u00a0\/\u00a0No pic no chat\u00a0\/\u00a0Online in China\u00a0\/\u00a0Beard beard beard beard\u00a0\/\u00a0Just be polite<\/p>\n

\u00a0NOTHING<\/strong><\/p>\n

It’s been a rough year\u00a0\/\u00a0Some friends who began it\u00a0\/\u00a0Are no longer here\u00a0\/\u00a0Bill and Terry died\u00a0\/\u00a0The other bastards lied\u00a0\/\u00a0At times, there wasn’t enough beer\u00a0\/\u00a0I’m missing my friends\u00a0\/\u00a0Who helped me belong\u00a0\/\u00a0Nothing stays too good or too bad\u00a0\/\u00a0For too long<\/p>\n

Couldn’t hold down a job\u00a0\/\u00a0I’m apparently worthless\u00a0\/\u00a0And somewhat unskilled\u00a0\/\u00a0Paintin’ houses white\u00a0\/\u00a0Mowin lawns outside\u00a0\/\u00a0And phone support finally lost its thrill\u00a0\/\u00a0I can’t make rent\u00a0\/\u00a0My connections are wrong\u00a0\/\u00a0Nothing stays too good or too bad\u00a0\/\u00a0For too long<\/p>\n

This year had some great times\u00a0\/\u00a0But karma priced em high\u00a0\/\u00a0Sixty five good days\u00a0\/\u00a0Three hundred stingers\u00a0\/\u00a0It feels like karma bled me dry\u00a0\/\u00a0These little silver linings\u00a0\/\u00a0Helped me get along\u00a0\/\u00a0Nothing stays too good or too bad\u00a0\/\u00a0For too long<\/p>\n

Nobody believes a healthy junkie\u00a0\/\u00a0Nobody trusts a skinny drunk\u00a0\/\u00a0Who’s to say you’re any smarter\u00a0\/\u00a0Listening to this middle aged punk?<\/p>\n

Let’s bury this year behind us\u00a0\/\u00a0And turn things for the better\u00a0\/\u00a0An unmarked grave\u00a0\/\u00a0One lucky break\u00a0\/\u00a0We’ll beat the world together\u00a0\/\u00a0I couldn’t keep from crying\u00a0\u00a0\/\u00a0So I wrote it in a song\u00a0\/\u00a0Nothing stays too good or too bad\u00a0\/\u00a0For too long<\/p>\n

All songs written by K. Dickson\/J. Tagliapietra (BMI)<\/p>\n

\u00a9 Noise Barn Records 2014<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

CRYING ON THE INSIDE I got a feather boa \/\u00a0And a robot car \/\u00a0I\u2019m a future A-bear \/\u00a0And a former porn star \/\u00a0I\u2019m a White Party King \/\u00a0I’m a hung daddy top \/\u00a0I\u2019m the boy next door \/\u00a0I\u2019m an undercover … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"parent":0,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","template":"","meta":{"spay_email":""},"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/P4j6uz-3s","_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/thechewtoys.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/pages\/214"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/thechewtoys.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/pages"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/thechewtoys.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/page"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/thechewtoys.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/thechewtoys.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=214"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"http:\/\/thechewtoys.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/pages\/214\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":217,"href":"http:\/\/thechewtoys.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/pages\/214\/revisions\/217"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/thechewtoys.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=214"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}